The Classy Alcoholic’s Guide To AZ Beer Week Valentine’s Day Events For Single People
Y’all know I love my Arizona beer fam. But as a single dude who’s gonna die alone because science hasn’t figured out a way to put together a lady wife made out of beer cans I’m always bummed out when Valentine’s Day comes around and I see a bunch of beer events catered to couples. But that’s why I’m here to tell you that you can actually attend these events even if you’re single as long as you’re okay with drinking alone and with the fact that nobody loves you.
Lumberyard Brewing Co & Beaver Street Brewery – Flagstaff
These two places are hosting a Valentine’s Day beer and cookie flight. They’re pairing three of their beers with three different styles of cookies for only $6. I don’t know why this would ever be advertised for couples because three beers and three cookies is what I use to make my morning smoothie every day just to get me out the door. At least until my ex got the blender in the divorce.
Granite Mountain Brewing – Prescott, AZ
Granite Mountain is doing a similar thing but they’re pairing four beers with four half donuts for $10. And, I mean, the people with the most successful of love lives don’t eat donuts. There’s this whole idea that Valentine’s Day gifts should be chocolates and other sweet things. But you and I both know that donuts are for fat sad boys to eat by the fistful while scrolling through our exes’ Facebook profiles in the middle of the night and listening to Savage Garden. Remember the 90s?
8-Bit Aleworks – Avondale, AZ
This video game-themed brewing company is hosting their annual “Be My Player 2” beer dinner priced at $80 per couple. This is a 4-course meal paired with Chinese food in honor of a yearly tradition that the owners engaged in every Valentine’s Day before opening a brewery. Since when do video gamers get to have friends, let alone spouses? My love of video games got me bullied relentlessly when I was a kid and literally my only friend in grade school was Sonic The Hedgehog. He and I would go on our own dates to really cool places around the world like the Green Hill Zone and Casino Night Zone and a bunch of other places with the word Zone in the name. Tails was never invited and he was more than welcome to go to hell!
1912 Brewing – Tucson, AZ
Are you interested in art? Because this place is hosting a Valentine’s Day Pint and Paint Class where you can express your heartache on a canvas for the world to see. Instead of painting a nice Bob Ross scene with a bunch of happy trees you can always create a Ralph Steadman-like sea of colorful nightmares. Just make sure they have enough red paint available for you, you sicko. Tickets are $30.
Public Brewhouse – Tucson, AZ
If you didn’t get enough sweets during your Valentine’s Day celebration Public Brewhouse is selling flights of beer and cupcake pairings all night long. And let’s face it, whether it’s because you’re drunk or on a total sugar high you’re gonna end up texting your ex at the end of the night. So before you do something you’ll definitely regret why not stop by this place to make one final good decision and drink some of their excellent beers? They don’t distribute anything outside of the brewery just yet so have a few pints then grab something to go. Their beers pair well with both tears AND Savage Garden albums.